WHAT IF?

I always torment my life by asking, "What If?"

What if I had stayed home and finished college and had a career close to home so I could have spent more time with my parents and helped them out. But then I would have not traveled and met the wonderful people I met nor spent the time I did with my brother and his family in Connecticut.

What if I had not married the man I married,  would my life had been easier and happier? But then I would not have had the 3 beautiful children I had.

What if I had chosen to stay in Coronado and let my children stay in one school district? Would they have had a better chance at a great education and completed college at a younger age? But then they would have not seen the places they saw or experienced the things they did, but maybe Rex would have not chosen the life he did and maybe he would be here today. But if their lives had been different, I may not have had the wonderful family I have today, especially my grandchildren.

What if I had gone in to wake up my son on New Year's Day to wish him a happy year and maybe I would have seen he was sicker and maybe I would have stayed to care for him or insist he go into the hospital. Maybe he would be alive.

And this is where What if stops. There are no "What If's" in the past tense. There is only "What Was", "What Is", and "What is To Come". 

It is time for me to throw this habit out the window. If Only I could!

RITA'S UNEXPECTED MEALS FOR HER UNEXPECTED GUESTS

My mom was a great cook. She had to quit school and never really learned to read. One day I asked her how she knew so many recipes. She told me that her dad worked on the railroad and the family traveled a lot when she was young. Since she was the oldest daughter and her mother was busy with all her little siblings, she was to assist the cooks at the different locations stayed at. Therefore she learned to cook meals from cooks all over the country.

Anyway, she was always cooking and no one could stop in without her preparing one of her great meals.

When I was a kid, it was a habit for folks to just stop by to visit, especially family and Ma would jump up and start cooking right away. Now, if she knew you were coming, she would plan and prepare a meal, like fried chicken, mash potatoes, salads and desserts of course, but if she did not know that you were coming it would not stop her from preparing a meal.

Her good old stand-by was Hamburger Gravy, Fried Potatoes and Onions, canned beans, vegetables and fruits, biscuits or tortillas. All on the table in less than 1 hour and she still managed to visit with her guests while cooking.

Even long after her death people would talk about my mom's unexpected meals and how fast she could prepare them. "Boy, your mom could cook. No matter when you stopped in, she would throw together a 7 course meal." And everyone loved her Unexpected Meal of Hamburger Gravy and Fried Potatoes.!

SHE TURNED 90 TODAY

She turned 90 today. Today she would not sit alone in her room missing her home, her love and those who have passed on. No, today she would be surrounded by family and friends who would come to celebrate her birthday.
Today, babies would sit in her lap and look up at her as if they knew and smiled. Little girls would sit and listen to her tell them stories. Her children would gather around her to insure she was enjoying herself. Grandchildren kneeling down next to her so that she could wrap her arms around them. Many of her old and new friends shared stories and kisses with her.
She sat in her wheelchair waiting and greeting all who came to visit. She recognized her brother slowly walking up to greet her and her smile broadened. He took her hand and for a brief moment, their eyes locked and they were transported back in time to a time when they were young and surrounded by all their siblings and their parents. Those were fun times with an exciting future in store for all of them. But it only lasted a moment and only I could see it.
This birthday would not have exciting times in store for her future. No, not yet anyway.

MY BROTHER RAY

My oldest brother Ray has been plagued with more than I think is humanly possible. A while back Ray had a stroke and could no longer find the words to say what he was thinking. He had failing eyesight and hearing like many in their 80's. At 86 he found he also had inoperable Cancer and now we can see that it is taking a toll on Ray. But the thing that is really pulling my brother down is the fact that he can no longer carry on a conversation or tell a story as he always enjoyed in the past.

I had been thinking about my brother and the life he has lead. I remember Ray always being a strong man. He has been a good son, brother, husband, father and grandfather. Ray always had something to say, a story to tell, words of wisdom, jokes and songs to sing. He inherited his father's gift for story telling, so when Ray spoke, everyone listened.

Remembering all his stories and stories about him kept me up many nights recently until I finally said, "I have to go see my brother to tell him what he has meant to me".

Thanks to our family, I was able to spend some time alone with Ray and Helen. The first thing out of my mouth was, "What do you want to talk about Ray?". His response, "Please tell me something, anything, a story, anything. I can't remember anymore. Please tell me". Wow, God sent me here to tell my brother a story.

So, I told my brother stories that my mom had told me; how when he was a small boy, he fell out of the back of my parents Model T while they were traveling to California and how his 3 other siblings did not tell my parents because they were not suppose to speak when my Dad was driving. I told my brother how my Mom had cried when Ray insisted that she sign her name on a document that would allow him to join the marines during WWII. Helen and I told him that he was one of so many young soldiers who landed on Iwo Jima. How so many lost their lives as soon as their feet hit the sand, but he made it all the way to the top of that mountain and was part of a battle that would become so famous.

We reminded him about coming home and finding himself a wife who would be his partner for life and how he worked so hard to take care of his family. And I reminded him how his faithfulness and good works had given him such a blessing from God.

For the rest of the weekend I witnessed a blessing that has made it possible for this man to endure so much. I saw his grandsons who are some big strong men come in to see their Papa each on their own time. Each approaching him and saying, "Hi Papa, I come to see you and let you know I love you. Can't forget his granddaughters. They all love him so much and spend time with him as well. Rays own children were in and out all weekend, knowing what needed to be done to help out, but still taking time out to kiss and hug their dad and spend a little time just chatting with him.

It was good medicine for him to have me, as my nephew calls it, "VALIDATING" my brother's life. But it was nothing compared to having his wife, children and grandchildren validating him on a daily basis. I will never forget how the sound of their voices brought such light into his eyes. 

I am sure when my brother gets to heaven, God will say, "Well done, my son."

 

 

You can take it with you

They say you can't take it with you. I beg to differ.

You can take Lust, Greed, Envy, Hatred all the way to the grave with you. In fact they will be there to bury you.

So, you might want to get rid of them NOW!

WHAT IF GOD DID NOT LET IT HAPPEN

So, I am getting dressed to go out and shop, when this thought suddenly hits me. Do I share this thought now or go shopping? I really want to go shopping now!

But here it goes: I was thinking about that question, "why did God let this happen". You have heard it and said it. But, what if God did not let it happen? What if God put all the warning signs out and we did not heed it. God put out all the rules of logic and concern down in a book to follow. However, he gave us the ability to choose! So, what if God made us stewards of his plan and we did not follow through and he gave warning after warning and we did not follow through. Did God let the inevitable happen or did we? Suppose God made you a steward by making you a leader of your country, your state, your city or your family and he put it in you the ability to create, develop, protect or establish and you ignored that calling by saying, "I am nobody, I could never do that" or maybe the world makes it more advantages for you to follow the world instead. Wow, I am just saying.

REGIMENTED

If I were regimented, I would be rich, thin and fit. If I were regimented I would have memorized scripture. I would be a master of something instead of a jack of nothing. If I were regimented, I would have saved thousands of hours because I would know where I left my keys, my purse, my car. If I were regimented, I would remember to tell you each day how special you are.